LETTER TO ME AND MY CHURCH MEMBERS ABOUT "THE VILLAGE"
Lowell Evans:
I am taking this opportunity to bring awareness of
how significant the impact of knowing you and your sharing of yourself has
helped not only me, but my brother (Kirk Hawkins) as well.
It is indeed ironic that we have been neighbors for
some time, yet never did our paths cross.
Rather, (as is always God’s way) at the right time, for the right
reasons, (God’s time is a good time) we met and it has been an event (then and
now) filled with ministering, testifying, and supporting one another.
I thought attending and sharing in the joy of your
book signing was a momentous occasions, and I could not have been prouder or
happier for you. Yet, the events that
took place at my home on April 16th, solidified for me that which I
had been telling you, “this book, your trials and tribulations, the lives you
touch via your book” are a part of something greater to come. This book, your
testimony and all that come with it, is your ministry.
As I shared with you, my brother (Kirk) is an
epileptic. He had gran-mal seizures from early childhood until adulthood. Eventually, (as an adult) he was told he was
seizure free. Yet it was not the seizures that scarred him for life mentally
and emotionally, it was reactions from our parents, (most especially my dad)
extended family members, school administration staff, and friends that has
forever (then and now) marked him.
As a result of ignorance, my father (who was a man’s
man and detested weakness in a male) screamed, beat, threatened, berated,
belittled, anointed, laid hands on, and ridiculed my brother in an attempt to
“exorcise the demons” that was bringing on the “fits”. He (my father) was convinced there was nothing
of a medical nature wrong with Kirk, but more of a “Spiritual” nature. In Kentucky, the Bible was the key to all
things known and unknown. As such, if “laying
on of hands” didn’t work in most instances, “laying on of the belt” (switches,
drop cords, etc.) would.
As word of Kirk’s abnormality spread through our
small community, so did the whispers, giggles, exclusion from play with his
peers (in case it was contagious), rumors spread labeling him as “retarded”,
and viciousness from children and adults ran rampant.
Eventually, Kirk was taken to the doctors and
massive amounts of Phenobarbital and Dilantin was prescribed. Yet the damage was done. Nothing could be
done (diagnosis or no) to sway people from their Bible thumping, demonic
spirits, beliefs. The effects of the drug treatment plan in fact exacerbated
their beliefs as he exhibited signs of drowsiness, being extremely lethargic,
sometimes confused, and at times, drooling.
When my brother graduated, he entered the United
States Army. Shortly after joining, he had another seizure. For the first time
he was given an effective treatment plan and reassurance that he was not a
“retard”.
For the next 15-20 years (from about 1977-1999), our
family never saw Kirk, and rarely did we hear from him. In 2003, Kirk reappeared. However, he revealed (to me alone) that he
was not well. Additionally, with much
bitterness, he shared with me how his previous years of treatment with respect
to epilepsy had destroyed his faith in people, almost caused him to kill
himself, had led him to drinking to forget and caused him to separate himself
from “family”.
When I met you (Lowell) and you shared your book and
your life as an epileptic with me, I was impacted in ways you could ever know
the full scope of. The memories of Kirk
being beaten were so very overwhelming.
I think for the first time in my life I understood just what he had gone
through and I began to thank God for sustaining him in spite of it all. Sadly,
my father (deceased since 2004) although enlightened about epilepsy, never
truly accepted my brother had a true medical disorder. As such their relationship (dad and Kirk)
remained strained until his passing.
On April 16th, I shared with you that I
had not heard from Kirk in 2 years. I
knew of your desire to minister to him that “he had epilepsy, but epilepsy did
not have to have him”. Lowell, when my
home phone rang and I saw Cell phone,
Ind. on the caller I.D., I knew God had heard our pleas. What would be the
odds of Kirk calling me on that day at that time after a 2 year silence? Before I answered that phone, I knew it was
my brother.
As you know, he shared with me he was calling to let
me know the nature of his illness had prompted his doctors to inform him of a
need to finally share and invite a relative into his affairs. Before I could
wrap my thoughts around that however, his next words stopped me cold. He said, “Sis, I can take anything except the
possibility of those seizures reoccurring. I would rather die than have another
seizure. But the Holy Spirit told me to call you because you have something or
someone for my seizures”. Lowell, I
could do nothing except hand you the phone.
I could give no introduction, I could say nothing. But I knew in my
spirit without a doubt you were meant to be in my home at that time on that day
for my brother. I handed you the phone
that day knowing something bigger than epilepsy was going to take place.
Lowell, on that day, the over whelming presence of
the Holy Spirit was in this house. Thank you for that day and the days that
have followed since then. Thank you for being obedient to the will of God in
your life. Thank you for taking the time
to speak with my brother on not only that day, but other days. Thanks for your words of encouragement to
him.
Finally, thank you and your church congregation for
the last act of kindness you have shown my brother. You took my brother’s name and depth of
despair before the body of your church. Many, many members signed your book
with in depth words of encouragement and promise to continue to Pray for him. I
did not know of this act of kindness. Truly I did not know that you and my
brother’s relationship had evolved to the point of you knowing his
address. My brother is a very private,
reclusive type person. Lowell, I don’t
have his address then or now.
My brother called me to report he had received the
book from you. Lowell, I was in awe of
my brother’s awe in knowing someone cared enough to send the book, that people
took the time to write to him personally in the book, that an African American
man (you) would reveal to the world he has epilepsy. I listened as my brother quoted scriptures,
praised God, and talked about his past and his anger at having epilepsy. Most of all, I listened as my brother began
to heal a little.
Lowell, my brother asked me to tell you on that day that if you did not hear
from him in awhile, not to worry, but the overwhelming feelings that book and
the words of encouragement from the congregation was new and a little too much
for him. Yet, he shocked me by saying
“sis, tells my story to Lowell or anyone. But make sure you tell it all”.
Lowell, Kirk Hawkins had epileptic seizures. But he
finished school, mastered a trade (as taught to him by our father) as an
electrician, served our country honorably in the United States Army for many
years, became a husband, father and now a grandfather. He (like you) is the
face of epilepsy.
My brother said he Prays no one ever has to have
seizures, yet he thank God for avenues of education such as your book to put
not just a medical term to the illness, but an instrument such as yours that
will actually give a face to the illness.
Thanks again!
We (Kirk and I) wish you the very best in your
endeavors now and in the future.
6/15/11
